5 Stages of Leaving a Narcissist

I explaied these stages in video format.

“I felt like I was drowning, but everyone around me thought I was floating.”

These were the haunting words of Sarah, a 34-year-old Boston marketing executive who spent six years in what therapists now recognize as a classic narcissistic relationship. According to a 2023 study by the American Psychological Association, nearly 20% of Americans have experienced narcissistic abuse in intimate relationships, yet most take an average of seven attempts before successfully leaving. The journey of leaving a narcissist isn’t a straight line — it’s a spiral staircase where each step brings both clarity and challenge. Let’s explore the five distinct stages that survivors typically experience when breaking free.

Stage 1: The Awakening

Picture this: You’re sitting at your kitchen table at 3 AM, scrolling through your phone, when suddenly, you read something that makes your heart stop. That article about narcissistic behavior patterns? It’s describing your relationship with painful accuracy. This is the awakening — when the fog begins to lift. During this stage, you might experience: — Random memories flooding back, now viewed through a new lens — Sudden recognition of…